Happy Fall!

Fall is in full swing around here.  I do think it is one of my favorite holidays, simply because life seems to slow down a little (although the last two weeks have been a whirlwind of craziness, so maybe that 'slowing down' stuff is all in my head).  Chad has been working hard on his cub scout achievements, and one he had to complete was called Family Fun.  Two of the requirements for it were to lead his family on a hike or nature walk, and to teach his family a game.  He decided to take us up to Cherry Springs, a nature area nearby.  It is beautiful up there, and this is the first time I had ever visited in the fall.  Breathtaking!!!  Mostly, we walked the trails, gathered walking sticks, raced, laughed and just enjoyed being together as a family. 

 

Chad had to teach us a game, so while were up there, he taught us how to play a bean bag target game.  Pretty simple-one person throws a bean bag and where it lands becomes the target.  Each other person throws a bean bag and tries to hit the target.   We had fun playing that for a bit before heading off on the trail again. 

 It was nearly dark before we made it back to the car where we enjoyed some cookies.  And this little lady was a gem, never complaining while we strolled along.  Oh, how I love those eyes!!! 

 

For us, fall also means soccer.  This was Tyler's first season playing, and he gave it a good effort.  He spent a lot of his time on the field in dreamland, but the important part was that he enjoyed it.  

Reality Check Moment
In my attempt to encourage Tyler to focus on the game, I told him at the beginning of each game that I wanted to see him make a goal.  Little did I realize that his desire to please me would be so great that he would resort to lying about making goals to get my praise.  Twice, he ran over during a time out to tell me that when I wasn't watching, he made two goals.  Hmmm.  I guess I need to work on finding things to really praise him for.  He's even done the same thing when he gets home from school and Chad tells me that he earned a blue ticket for being good, or a sucker for the same reason, Tyler will tell me that he earned a sucker too, but he already ate it.  So, rather than praise him for what I know are untruths, we have started to call these "tall tales" and move on.  Tyler has definitely been my most challenging lately, with major tantrums and serious attempts to get attention, even when we have been heaping it on in large doses.  I got to thinking that simply his placement as second in our family probably is the cause for some of that.  He has a big brother to try to live up to, and two littler siblings that seem to take a lot of time and attention and often, he kind of gets overlooked.  We're working on changing that, and hopefully, we'll see some improvement in behavior and attitude. 

Boys

There is a saying that hangs in my laundry room.  It looks like this . . .

 

HERE is the link so you can print it too.

Only this morning, for about the 1000th time,  I went into my boys bathroom and I really wished I had a sign that said instead,

"If you are still in the process of raising 3 boys, 

please remember that the pools and pools of  

urine behind the toilet 

will disappear all to quickly, 

and that you WILL NOT (no surprise)

 miss them at all!!!"  

So, if anyone out there wants to make me this sign, I will gladly hang it on my bathroom door. 

Lunch Dates

Dave and I have made an effort to take each of our kids out for a "date" each month.  They're nothing formal.  Tyler went on a date with me to the dentist office, and Chad has gone with Dave to get a few things at Home Depot.  Mostly, they are not planned; the opportunity just presents itself and we take it.  It is the time together that we're aiming for, not what were doing.

But this month, I decided that I needed to set up a mommy lunch date with each of my boys.  There is a little bakery near Chad's school that I thought would be perfect to kidnap him from school and drag him there for lunch.  When I mentioned the idea to him, he suggested that instead, I come and eat lunch with him at his school.  He also let me know that because it was a "date", I needed to find a babysitter for the other two boys.  I consented.  I found out after the fact that my lunch had cost me $4.00!!!  For school lunch-seriously?!  WOW!  I won't do that again!  But it was so fun to be with him in that setting.  I met each of his friends and got to see how he interacts with them.  I saw how he eats (or should I say, doesn't eat-sometimes his lunches come home untouched).  The best part was that when he was finished with his lunch, he left to go play outside . . . without me.  I was still in at the table finishing my food.  I had to go out to the playground and find him to tell him I was leaving.  :)  I wish I had remembered my camera, but it was a fun time.   

Of course, Tyler wanted to have his own "lunch date" too.  He wanted to go to "Old McDonald's".  We actually went for a breakfast date because when I got everyone in the car to go and run my errands this morning, he informed me that he never ate breakfast (I had gone running during breakfast and I never asked Dave who had eaten) I and I had been in too much a hurry to eat either.  So, rather than stick to our lunch plan, we moved it up a few hours.  Tyler wanted Greyson to be on his date too, so we headed to "Old McDonald's" and had a great time. 

Sometimes, I think something little like this helps our kiddos feel connected to us and loved in a different way.  I'm looking forward to many more "dates" with my kiddos over the years. 

Lessons from running

To those of you who are not runners, it may sound crazy when I say, "I LOVE running!"  Yes, I do often lay in my bed at night dreaming of my next day's run; and when I want a free minute to myself, I run.  So, the funny thing about running is that even as much as I love it, there are still days when I run and it feels like I've never run a day before in my life!  Why is that?  I can feel it from the first step I take, whether it will be a run like that, or a run where I could go on for hours and never tire.  Well, my last run was one of those "I feel like I've never run before" kind of runs.  I'd keep finding a landmark ahead and tell myself, "you can go that much further" and then when I'd get there, I'd find another marker to push myself to.  But I got to thinking as I pounded the pavement home-really, parenting is a lot like running.  Some days (few days around here) pass in a flash.  You look back on them and think, "Wow!  I'm starting to get this parenting thing down."  Then you get a day when you feel like a total failure and you wonder if you are ruining your children.  Often, you know it is going to be one of those days from the moment everyone wakes up.  The whining and tears begin even before the kids exit their beds.  On those days, you have to look ahead and say to yourself, "I can make it till 10am", and then "to lunch time."  Then when lunch passes, you say to yourself, "I can get to dinner" and finally, "I can make it to bedtime."  But somehow, we make it through.  I guess it's like that with everything.  Think about a tough pregnancy, when you literally thought you'd never make it to the delivery, and somehow, you take it one step at a time, until you arrive at your goal, holding that precious bundle in your arms.   Or those last weeks of the semester when you were in college.  Boy, I threatened to quit probably every day during those tough times.  But, magically, you get through one final at a time, and then, you arrive.  Maybe life is meant to be looked at from the smaller perspective.  When we try to conquer it all, it is too overwhelming, but when we break it down, we really can "eat the elephant one bite at a time." 
I'll admit that I often wake up feeling like I cannot handle the day ahead of me.  Sometimes, it is overbooked.  Other days, it is a blank slate, with nothing planned to fill our time.  Either way, tomorrow, I'm going to conquer it-one step at a time.  How about you?

Homework

I read a post a while back of another mother talking about homework.  She said that homework is one of her favorite ways to spend time with her children.  When I read that, I honestly thought, "I have got to be doing something wrong!"  I'll be honest, I hate homework time.  It seems like a whole lot of busy work mixed with some major whining, all while I try to keep my younger two kiddos occupied so I can supervise the one doing the homework.  If I sit down to read with Chad, Greyson bawls that I'm not reading his book.  Ahhh!  Anyone else feel like this?  From a teachers standpoint, it makes me feel a little bad for having ever assigned homework back in the day.  How can anyone "love" this time with their children? 
Well, several weeks ago, I thought I'd put a little spin on our homework routine.  I happened to remember that I had kept all of Chad's unfinished worksheets from kindergarten.  I pulled them out and sure enough, Tyler can manage them.  So, while Chad does his worksheets, Tyler gets to do his own "homework".  Truthfully, Chad is much more into what Tyler is doing, and is pretty excited that Tyler can do homework, that he forgets to whine at all. 

It has actually become something I do look forward to.  As for the reading, we're still working on that, but I think we're making progress.